God has to be understood, not believed, as much as a miracle can possibly be understood. The understanding of the nature of God would give you peace of mind, help you to confront death and become honest, accepting, happy.
The Divine Surprise and Shame for humanity when die is Hell and Heaven is ourselves for eternity til endless death when all life die and God die. The irrefutable as a mathematical truth kalam cosmological argument concludes by reason that in order to exist existence an impossibility possible, miracle, first uncaused cause, origin not originated, creator without creator, eternal God in infinite time must exist. I was created by my parents and i always existed impossibility possible miracle God because i am my parents that are my grandparents that are everything else. God is neither created nor destroyed, only transformed alive or dead. When we die the mind is not destroyed, only transformed to become the past of God to know everything. God is the perfect living entity, eternal and mortal, finite and infinite, everything and nothing, love and hate, created with and without creator. We are literally an infinitesimal part of infinite God. I can prove the existence of God ending atheism and religion and collapsing mortality rates when The Theory of Life and Death impossibility possible miracle God is known.