later i had a cannabis overdose of unconscious infinite happiness impossibility possible miracle God eternal mortal finite infinite alive inert dream reality gradual stepped perfect imperfect superior inferior universe number everything nothing animal plant mineral conscious unconscious creation evolution money drugs freedom same different fantasy created with without creator with without beginning end in time past present future from the will to live love care matter. heaven and hell is ourselves for eternity til endless death. there are no secrets. God can not be deceived. truth is life and lie is death.